Friday, January 20, 2012

Friday Funny: Today's Groupon Deals

Everyone knows about the awesome coupon websites, Groupon, Living Social, Bloomspot, and such.  Groupon came out with THIS coupon for the Hartford, CT area that I thought you might get a chuckle out of...

Here's the first line of their description...

Losing weight is at the top of everyone's to-do list, but since climbing a ladder to get there is exhausting, it rarely gets crossed off. Do away with weight-loss obstacles with today's Groupon to WellQuest, LLC.

Crazy, right?  Climbing a ladder is exhausting?  I climbed one at least three times yesterday and it seemed rather easy.  And it gets better!  The description continues with the following...

WellQuest, the official body sculpting company of the Miss Connecticut Organization...
Not that I had much faith in any Miss [insert state or country] organizations, but they just got knocked down a couple rungs on the extremely-difficult-to-climb ladder of my faith.  And for those of you who think it stops there, the next deal comes to us on behalf of every guy who will be glued to the TV for the upcoming Super Bowl!

It's a bottle opener.  It's a universal remote.  It's a bottle-opening universal remote!  They should have double-deal Groupons so that you could get the bottle-opening universal remote for that super bowl party and then get the pizza, nachos, and decades of beer and lazy lifestyle laser treated at WellQuest LLC above at an additional discount.  God knows you'll be feeding into an unending loop!

I'm sorry, but I can't help but keep adding to this post; I found another.  The ultimate Skuuzi.

"Holding a cold beverage is a leading cause of frostbite and a less embarrassing cause of frostbite to tell your doctor about than tickling a snowman. Keep extremities extra warm with today's Groupon to Sküüzi."

In other words, first there was the glove and mitten.  Then there was the thermal bottle holder.  Now, you can have two in one while it both limits your dexterity AND makes you look like 110% more of a fool than your mother already thought you were.  Congrats, you're an idiot!

Keep checking back for more!  haha


1.  Have you ever purchased a Groupon, Living Social, Bloomspot, or similar coupon before?
I've never purchased one, but a close friend of mine works for Living Social and I hear a lot from him about it.  The idea seems great - boosting both consumer purchasing as well as business for local areas - but they never have on I'm interested in. 

2.  Does anyone else have no idea when the Super Bowl is or who's playing?
Please tell me I'm not the only one!  If you do know, enlighten a fellow athlete, tell me who you're rooting for, and let me know who's bringing the bottle-opening universal remote!  (Post Edit:  I've been informed that no one knows who's playing in the Super Bowl yet.  At least we're all on the same page now!)

Swim fast.  Bike smart.  Run hard. 


Coy Martinez said...

I have never bought the Groupon's but I know lots of people that do. I laughed out loud at both of those things. How stupid! If you're too lazy to climb a ladder, you should be tripped and made to fall on your face while standing up.

I'm a big NFL fan. I'm not sure when or how it happened but I love football. I like lots of different teams too! Eagles are my favorite. They're super ghetto so I catch grief over it all the time.

Super Bowl is Feb 5th, I'm guessing the Patriots will play the Giants. I'll probably watch while spinning :)

Meg O @watchmegorun said...

I've purchased a few but these ones I'm always like Wtf? Who buys this?!

Christine said...

Groupon has really gone downhill recently... so lame.

Mmmassage said...

Who buys this stuff? The same people who buy Snuggies, Shake Weights, and the Bacon Genie. Silly, silly, people who like shiny, and totally unnecessary products. I think the rest of the world calls them Americans. :)

Colleen said...

I love getting my groupon emails. It's like "What crazy thing can they try to make glamorous". Then I usually laugh at how many people have bought said item! Those are some good ones for sure!

Michael said...

Those are the craziest groupons I've seen I have bought a couple but for restaurants.